One of the perks of writing about a game you enjoy, or hope to enjoy, like Starcraft 2 is when you find something incredibly funny you can share it. Well I did, and here it is. Now remember, this is completely not serious, though I suspect the person that posted the question might have been.

Now, I won’t post the whole “supposed” conversation or instant message from this unknown person, however, they were supposed to be visiting blizzard headquarters and being wooed by them. In the process this unknown person was supposedly given a beta key for Starcraft 2. As well as being let in on the secret that certain press and of course friends and family, bowling buddies, the neighborhood block watch, and an entire class of 6th graders, had been given keys already for the Starcraft 2 Beta. Yeah, right.

Now I know the good game developers, artists, and story writers are in high demand everywhere including at Blizzard, but I have a hard time swallowing the idea that any would be employee would be let in on anything top secret.

Okay, let me say it again, before you go rushing off trying to find somebody with the top super secret ultra hidden “Friends and Family beta key for Starcraft 2.” I’m sorry it’s just not happening folks. I knew this even before I read the official Blizzard response to this newest rumor.

It’s not that I doubt that certain people will be guaranteed keys to the Starcraft 2 Beta when it does indeed come. Blizzard will want media, there will be a core group of pro-gamers, and perhaps a short list of other persons. However, a secret “Friends and Family” beta just doesn’t fit in with the corporate image, or even the moneygrubbing corporation image people have been trying to foster since the plans for Starcraft 2 trilogy announcement. It doesn’t make economic sense.

Friends and family are all well and good, but if you ask me the game developer’s friends and family are probably going to be like the old story of the shoemaker’s kids – shoeless. Or in this case gameless. There are no doubt perks for working for a game company, but when it’s a corporation centered upon efficiency, quality and story line, as well as keeping a secret as well as blizzard seems to – well, special status is probably not in the cards for even developer’s families, golfing buddies, or the annoying media who keep asking –“When!”

So I urge you when the next rumor comes out where perhaps an unnamed, freckle faced, sixth grader is quoted as saying that his dad was a game developer and he had just gotten done playing the entire trilogy for Starcraft 2, don’t believe it.

It’s a pity really; that there is no super secret “Friends and Family Starcraft 2 beta”, because I was considering traveling to Blizzard HQ and claiming to be Kerrigan’s second cousin three times removed by marriage. With a couple of banelings in tow I would have calmly threatened to explode if someone did not give me a key. Oh well.

• 3 upgrades for weapons/armor/shields
• Use Starcraft 2 editor to create your own maps and games
• Protoss units can be attacked during warp-in
• Terran, Zerg and Protoss all maximum 200 population cap
• No upkeep during game play
• Map sizes are similar to the first Starcraft
• Starcraft II heroes have special abilities but cannot be used in multiplayer
• Zerg Mutalisks can still damage multiple targets
• 12-18 colours will be available for personalized unit battles
• Black is not available as a color for your units
• There will be several unique hybrid units in the campaign wars
• The Colossus can travel using a phase prism
• Starports in Starcraft II won’t change into Starbases anymore
• A Ghost can use a nuke and a drop pod at the same time

• Massive landscapes
• New units for Protoss, Terran and Zerg
• Old units return with improvements
• Battle.net will have new features
• Single player and multiplayer options
• Starcraft II is a trilogy – the base game and two expansion packs
• Titles are: Wings of Liberty, Heart of the Swarm and Legacy of the Void
• Each game will concentrate on a race, first Terran, Zerg, Protoss
• This will not affect multiplayer 3 race action
• The Terran campaign will be 26-30 missions long

More Advanced

• Nukes will not appear bigger on enemies screen
• Faster game speed settings are here to stay
• Select multiple buildings at the same time
• Heroes will have more special features than other units
• You will not be able to create a hero in multiplayer mode
• There will be yellow high yield minerals for harvest
• Chatting to allies will be a Starcraft II pre set option
• Allies will be allowed to share resources
• There will still be grid based building placement
• A marines shield upgrade is bought by doing research. It adds hit points
• The old Photon Cannon has been replaced with a Phase Cannon
• The Colossus can be attacked simultaneously by ground and air troops
• Pressing the *Alt key will display the health of your buildings and units
• New music for Starcraft II